John Lennon once wrote that "life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans".
A little over one year after moving to Adelaide life has changed in more ways than I could have dreamed 18 months ago, yet it also feels to be in hiatus.
There is much indeed for which to be thankful: the children are well settled into their schools; I am working outside the home for the first time in many years in a four-day-a-week job; we are attending a church that we like; and my husband's position has proved to be well-chosen. It would be selfish for me to resent the changes that life has wrought.
Why then do I sometimes feel that I am camping, that I am not living my real life, or the life I want to have?
There is still so much uncertainty. We have not bought a home yet. My job is still not permanent after 5 months. My books are still in boxes in the shed.
And some days I simply ache for my old life, the life that I loved so much. I miss my friends intensely. If only I could go back in time, how much would I value what I had!
In the dark of night I often walk through our old, dear, red house in my head. I can see every piece of furniture, I can feel every surface; the texture of the bricks; the bubbly rustiness of the stair rail outside the laundry, the smoothness of the polished banister in the hall. I can remember how the sunlight moved through each room throughout the day. I remember each little fruit tree and rose bush I planted so lovingly and wonder whether the new owners are taking care of them or have ripped them out.
The biggest mistake I made back then was thinking that the life I had built for myself could be permanent. I know better now.
Yet I think it is only human to desire to put down roots, to make plans and bring them to fruition.
How have you coped with major changes in your life?
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